- Jay Pritchett: A damn tree's blocking the street. I need my chainsaw.
- Phil Dunphy: Jay, I know you didn't ask my advice...
- Jay Pritchett: I'm glad you noticed that. I've been stuck here all day. Now, I'm going to that bar! The last thing I need's another delay. Where the hell's the chainsaw?
- Phil Dunphy: It's right there.
- Jay Pritchett: [Thunder crashes; Jay sighs and hangs his head] Oh, I'm not gonna get there, am I?
- Phil Dunphy: We don't have to talk about it.
- Jay Pritchett: Old Navy buddy of mine, Big Jake, died today. Guys in my unit have a tradition whereas, if one of us goes, the rest of us, no matter where we are, find the nearest Irish pub, and at 7:00, silently toast the fallen.
- [Phil pushes him a chair and Jay sits]
- Jay Pritchett: Started with ten guys. Four of us left. Probably should have told Gloria about it, but I don't know. We... We all went through some rough stuff together... Hard to talk about.
- [Phil has been pulling out drinks and St Patrick's Day decorations to build a makeshift Irish pub. Jay checks his watch and silently makes his toast]
- Jay Pritchett: Thanks.
- [Phil goes to leave, but Jay grabs a second cup]
- Jay Pritchett: Phil.
- [They both silently drink and watch the rain]
- Phil Dunphy: What's the plan, Luke? There are no bad ideas, but waving a metal shovel around in an electrical storm could have a downside, so let's put it back in the garage, huh?
- Gloria Delgado-Pritchett: Why are you being such a dummy? Is this because I...
- Manny Delgado: Mom, I don't want to talk about it.
- Gloria Delgado-Pritchett: Why am I the only one in this house that ever wants to talk about things?
- [Joe walks in sniffling]
- Gloria Delgado-Pritchett: Ay, papi, what is wrong?
- Joe Pritchett: Not now.
- Gloria Delgado-Pritchett: Okay, that's it. If the men in this house don't start talking to me, I swear to God that I will make life miserable for each and every one of you!
- [Lightning flashes outside]
- Gloria Delgado-Pritchett: No, not yet.
