Craig Ferguson credited as playing...
Simon
- Joy Scroggs: What do you think, Simon?
- Simon: I think you're confirming my worst fear that anything I do in bed will be analyzed and dissected by a pack of critical females.
- Joy Scroggs: *You* have nothing to worry about.
- Elka Ostrovsky: Yeah, we have no idea you're an uncut jewel.
- Simon: Halle Berry is in town visiting relatives, and Star Magazine wants a shot. If I can find the smallest trace of cellulite on her thighs, I'll get the cover.
- Melanie Moretti: A shot of Helle Berry with cellulite would make my day.
- [last lines]
- Joy Scroggs: Just how unflattering was Gwyneth's bathing suit?
- Simon: Hideous. Flattened her breasts and gave her back fat.
- Joy Scroggs: Ah! yes!
