Maria Bamford credited as playing...
Carole Beekler
- Dylan Beekler: [waking up in the car] Wha- what's going on?
- Dylan Beekler: [wide awake] What? Where are you people takin' me!
- Richard: Honey, do you remember great uncle Gerald?
- Dylan Beekler: No, but he sounds like a child molester.
- [Richard rolls his eyes]
- Carole Beekler: Dylan! That was uncle Leonard
- Carole Beekler: [chuckles] and it was all in Thailand, so it's legal.
- Richard: The point is, uncle Gerald loved you very much, but he's no longer with us.
- Dylan Beekler: Where the hell is he?
- Alexis Beekler: Use your context clues, stupid! He's dead!
- Richard: Your sister's right. Uncle Gerald's in Heaven now. We're on the way to the funeral.
- Dylan Beekler: Awesome! My first funeral? Yes! I'm finally gonna see a dead body!
- Carole Beekler: Dylan, I know you're upset, but this is an opportunity for some quality family time. Plus, there's some pretty neato roadside attractions along the way, like The World's Largest Box of Wine.
- Richard: Fun fact: I heard that the boxed stuff is just as good as the bottled stuff these days.
- Alexis Beekler: Wha? Ah! I wanna go there! Stop the car, pull over!
- Richard: You know, I- I read that boxed wine is just as good as the bottled stuff these days.
- Carole Beekler: Is that true?
- Greg: I dunno.
- Greg: [to Alexis] I just fish out the dead rats.
- Greg: [giving Alexis a cup and filling it] Shh.
- Alexis Beekler: [giggles, slurring] Greg, you're such a bad boy.
- [last lines]
- [the priest funeral director empties Gerald's urn into the lake]
- Golan: [loudly sing-song] Bor-rrring!
- [Golan laughs, sitting at the back of the boat, his massive form causing the bow to rise high into the air]
- Carole Beekler: [softly] Richard, I think it was very magnanimous of you to invite Golan into the boat.
- Richard: [sotto voce] Honestly, do I even have a choice?
- Dylan Beekler: Nope, he's family now. Right, Golan?
- Golan: Whatever. I'm over it already.
