Justin Roiland credited as playing...
Morty Smith • Rick Sanchez • Morty • Rick • Mr. Poopybutthole • Additional Voices • Evil Morty • Council of Ricks • Activist • Adult Roy Parsons • Albert Einstein • Alien in Arcade • Ants in My Eyes Johnson • Assimilated Alien Shouting 'Race War' • Baby Legs • Biker • Blips & Chitz Announcer • Blob Alien • Butthole Ice Cream Parlour Employee • Call Centre Alien #3 • Chef • Criminal • Cromulons • Cyborg Alien Judge • Doofus Rick • Dream Aliens • Evil Rick • Eyeholes Man • Fake Door Salesman • Federation Medical Technician • Football Announcer • Garbage Goober • Gazorpazorpfield • Gear Person • Glenn • Golfer • Greebybobe • Green Alien • House Hunter • Improv Guy • Jan Michael Vincent Announcer • Jan Michael Vincent Soldier • Killer #1 • Killer #2 • Killer #3 • Little Dipper • Lumberjack • Magma-Q • Magnesium-J • Meeseeks • Michael Thompson • Mr. Meeseeks • Mr. Sneezy • Mr. Sneezy Car Commercial Announcer • Noob Noob • Octopus Man • Old Lady on House Hunter TV Show • Opposite News Announcer • PA System • Philip Jacobs • Pichael Thompson • Police Chief • Police Officer • Randy Dicknose • Shmloony • Stealy • Talking Tower • Teddy Mason • Tophat Jones • Truth Tortoise • Turbulent Juice Announcer • Two Brother Movie Announcer • Unmuscular Michael
- Morty: Don't run. Nobody exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, everybody's gonna die. Come watch TV.
- Therapist: Why didn't you want to come here?
- Rick: Because I don't respect Therapy. Because I'm a Scientist. Because I invent, transform, create and destroy for a living and when I don't like something about the World I change it. And I don't think going to some rented office in a strip mall to listen to an Agent of Averageness explain which words mean which feelings has ever helped anyone do anything. I expect it's helped a lot of people get comfortable and stop panicking, which is a state of mind we value in the animals we eat but not something I want for myself. I'm not a cow! I'm a Pickle! When I feel like it. So, you asked...
- Rick: I hate to bust your bubble Morty, but love is a chemical reaction that compels animals to mate. It hits hard, then slowly fades leaving you floundering in a failing marriage. Break the cycle, Morty! Focus on science.
- Rick: I put a Spatially Tessellated Void inside a modified Temporal Field until a Planet developed intelligent life. I then introduced that life to the wonders of electricity! Which they now generate on a Global Scale and some of it goes to powering my engine and charging my phone and stuff.
- Morty: You have a whole planet sitting around making your power for you? That's Slavery!
- Rick: It's society! They work for each other, Morty, they pay each other, they get married and have children to replace themselves when they're too old to make power.
- Morty: That just sounds like Slavery with extra steps!
- Rick: Ooh la la! Someone's going to get laid in College...
- Rick: Good pitches, kids, I'm almost proud. But watch closely as Grandpa topples an empire by changing a one to a zero.
- Insectoid 1: Mr President, the blemphlark's value just dropped to nothing!
- Insectoid 2: What do you mean?
- Insectoid 1: I mean our single centralised Galactic currency just went from being worth one of itself to being worth zero of itself.
- Insectoid 2: Calm down people! Deploy the Galactic Militia and declare martial law.
- Insectoid 3: Yes sir! What shall I pay them with?
- Insectoid 4: Their payment will be the honour they feel to serve... wait a minute, who's paying me to yell at this guy?
- Insectoid 1: I can answer that, for money!
- Insectoid 2: Gentlemen! There's a solution here you're not seeing.
- [Shoots himself]
