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Hugh Laurie in House (2004)

Quotes

Here Kitty

House

  • Dr. Remy 'Thirteen' Hadley: [House is placing a cat around several coma patients to prove that it can't predict when someone will die] Don't you wanna check their charts?
  • Dr. Gregory House: 'Course not. This is a double blind. I don't want to even subconsciously signal to Teddy which one is the sickest.
  • Dr. Lawrence Kutner: Her name's Debbie.
  • Dr. Chris Taub: Are those welts on that guy's arm?
  • Dr. Eric Foreman: Were they here when we got here?
  • Dr. Remy 'Thirteen' Hadley: [looking at the coma patients chart] He has a severe cat allergy.
  • Dr. Gregory House: [House quickly injects medicine into the coma patient] That never happened.
  • Dr. Lawrence Kutner: Why are you pushing the crash cart?
  • Dr. Gregory House: Because patients sometimes crash, and they haven't yet invented a crash tractor for me to drive wildly around the hallways.
  • Dr. Gregory House: If you're gonna kill me and rape me, please do it in that order.
  • Dr. Lawrence Kutner: [the supposedly psychic cat has just lain down next to a coma patient] Hey look at Debbie.
  • Dr. Gregory House: [looking at the patients chart] Good news Mr... Limpert. When you *don't* die tonight, you will finally have done something good for the world. As opposed to your life as a...
  • [looking at the chart]
  • Dr. Gregory House: fireman...
  • Dr. Remy 'Thirteen' Hadley: Why are you still alive?
  • Dr. Lawrence Kutner: I'm not sure.
  • Dr. Remy 'Thirteen' Hadley: I guess he was impressed that you stood up to him. And got a cat to pee on his chair.
  • Dr. Lawrence Kutner: Yeah. A cat.
  • Dr. Gregory House: [Searching for the cat] Here puss, puss, puss, puss, puss.
  • Dr. Eric Foreman: Say "puss" one more time. It's the sixth puss that really does it.
  • Dr. Lawrence Kutner: [House is holding a cat and smoking a cigar] What are you doing?
  • Dr. Gregory House: "No, Mr. Bond - I expect you to die."
  • Dr. Chris Taub: Her neural exam was normal. No subsequent seizures. It's not life threatening. It's not important.
  • Dr. Gregory House: Luckily, neither are you.
  • Dr. Lisa Cuddy: Confirm she's faking or I'm going to have to kick her out.
  • Dr. Gregory House: There's that voice again.
  • Dr. Lisa Cuddy: I'll give you 24 hours.
  • [Cuddy leaves]
  • Dr. Gregory House: Consecutive?
  • Dr. Gregory House: [knocks on door] I know you're in there, I can hear you caring!
  • Dr. Lawrence Kutner: Oh you were lying about the throat spray. That does make more sense. So why are you wasting Taub's time?
  • Dr. Gregory House: Because I don't want him to know that I'm wasting my time disproving his fake seizure theory.
  • Morgan West: I'm not a Munchausen. I'm gonna die unless you help me.
  • Dr. Gregory House: You're going to have to come up with something more original.
  • Morgan West: A cat predicted my death!
  • Dr. Gregory House: Cats make terrible doctors. Oh no, wait, that's women. You're screwed.
  • Dr. Gregory House: I don't care if her superstitions make her feel better. I just want her to think more clearly.
  • Dr. James Wilson: Maybe that can make her as happy as you are.
  • Dr. James Wilson: [to House as he's about to perform an autopsy] I put up with your obsessions. I even encourage them... for one reason, they save lives. I don't know what you're doing now.

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