- Peter Griffin: [as the sprinklers in the panic room mostly fill the room with water; Peter, Lois, Chris, Brian and Stewie are up to their necks in it] The Griffin family history is a rich tapestry. But, since we're all gonna die, there's one more secret I feel I have to share with you: I did not care for The Godfather.
- Lois Griffin: What?
- Peter Griffin: Did not care for The Godfather.
- Chris Griffin: How can you even say that, dad?
- Peter Griffin: Didn't like it.
- Lois Griffin: Peter, it's so good! It's like the perfect movie!
- Peter Griffin: This is what everyone always said. Whenever they say...
- Chris Griffin: Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, I mean, you never see, Robert Duvall!
- Peter Griffin: Fine. Fine. Fine actor, did not like the movie.
- Brian Griffin: Why not?
- Peter Griffin: Did not... couldn't get into it.
- Lois Griffin: Explain yourself. What didn't you like about it?
- Peter Griffin: It insists upon itself, Lois.
- Lois Griffin: What?
- Peter Griffin: It insists upon itself.
- Lois Griffin: What does that even mean?
- Chris Griffin: Because it has a valid point to make, it's insisted!
- Peter Griffin: It takes forever getting in; you spend like six and a half hours... You know, I can't get through, I've never even finished the movie. I've never seen the ending.
- Chris Griffin: [annoyed] You've never seen the ending?
- Stewie Griffin: How can you say you don't like it if you haven't even given it a chance?
- Lois Griffin: I agree with Stewie. It's not really fair.
- Chris Griffin: It's outrageous.
- Peter Griffin: I have tried on three separate occasions to get through it, and I get to the scene where all the guys are sitting around on the easy chairs.
- Lois Griffin: Yeah, it's a great scene. I love that scene.
- Peter Griffin: I have no idea what they're talking about. It's like they're speaking a different... You know, that's where I lose interest in it.
- Lois Griffin: You know what, Peter...
- Chris Griffin: They're speaking Italian!
- Lois Griffin: The language they're speaking is a language of subtlety; it's something you don't understand.
- Peter Griffin: I love The Money Pit. That is my answer to that statement.
- Lois Griffin: Exactly.
- Peter Griffin: Well, there you go.
- Lois Griffin: Whatever.
- Chris Griffin: I like that movie too.
- Brian Griffin: [points to Peter's panic room] Peter, what is that?
- Peter Griffin: Well, I got the idea to build a panic room after I saw that movie "The Butterfly Effect". I thought, "Wow, this is terrible. I wish I could escape to a place where this movie couldn't find me."
- Joe Swanson: We've captured the burglars.
- Lois Griffin: Oh, thank God!
- Joe Swanson: Unfortunately, they're pressing sexual harassment charges against your daughter.
- Peter Griffin: Well, that was a close call.
- Joe Swanson: You know, ah, Meg should probably get a lawyer.
- Lois Griffin: [to Peter] Oh, sweetie, thank you for keeping our spirits up with your stories.
- Joe Swanson: Your daughter is a sexual predator. If you don't do anything, she could go to jail for a long time.
- Peter Griffin: Don't thank me, Lois, thank my ancestors for living lives of greatness.
- Joe Swanson: [to his fellow cops] Okay, guys, just take her away.
- Peter Hitler: Hey, there you are! Ready to go see that new skin flick at the boobengarden?
- Adolf Hitler: Can't you see I'm busy?
- Peter Hitler: What are you doin'? Stuff?
- Adolf Hitler: Yes.
- Peter Hitler: Nazi stuff?
- Adolf Hitler: Yes, Peter, Nazi stuff.
- Peter Hitler: Can I help?
- Adolf Hitler: No, Peter. Just let me work, alright?
- Peter Hitler: Alright.
- [sits in chair, hits hand on arm rest while mouthing fart noises, gets some tape and puts it over his nose]
- Peter Hitler: Addy. Addy. I'm Tojo... I'm... Look, I'm Tojo. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da, I am from Japan.
- Adolf Hitler: Will you stop that?
- Peter Hitler: Can I borrow 50 marks?
- Adolf Hitler: What happened to the 50 marks from last week?
- Peter Hitler: Your girlfriend's not cheap. Ooooh.
- Meg Griffin: So... is, uh, is this like the part where you guys have your way with me?
- Robber 2: What...?
- Meg Griffin: You know, where I'm like helpless, and you guys take turns... you know?
- Robber 2: OH, NO! Oh, God! Oh, no, no no no!
- Robber 1: [from another room] What'd she say?
- Robber 2: She asked if we were gonna have our way with her.
- Robber 1: Ewww!
- Meg Griffin: No, seriously, I won't scream or anything.
- [leans in for a kiss]
- Robber 2: No! No, I, I... no, no sale!
- Meg Griffin: [jumps on him on the floor] C'mon! I'm pretty!
- [Robber 1 screams and hides behind robber 2, who has entered the room]
- Robber 1: Are you okay?
- Robber 2: Yeah, I was so scared.
- Meg Griffin: Dad, I can't go through the vent.
- Peter Griffin: Yeah, she's right. We need to grease her up so she doesn't get stuck. Everybody spit on Meg!
- Meg Griffin: [the family spits on her] Stop! Stop, you guys! Ah! Stop! Stop! Okay, okay. I meant I can't do it because there are burglars down there.
- Peter Griffin: Come on! They're not gonna touch you. You're covered with spit.
- Lois Griffin: Be careful, Meg.
- Meg Griffin: [Peter pushes her into the vent, followed by sounds of her falling down] Ahh! Ahh! I hate you all!
- Stewie Griffin: I hate you too, bitch. Oh, no, no, I'm just kidding. Can you imagine?
- Meg Griffin: Dad! What is it? What's going on? I heard a noise. Is somebody downstairs?
- Peter Griffin: [leveling her with his baseball bat] Oh, god, Meg, you startled me. I'm sorry.
- Meg Griffin: Oh my gawd, we're all gonna die!
- Peter Griffin: No we won't. We'll survive by eating each other.
- Diane Simmons: Coming up in this half hour, flies on your face. How many is too many?
- Tom Tucker: But first, that orange thing in the sky and what you can do to please it.
- Peter Hitler: Hey, whaddya say we all head over to the Boozenpuken, huh? Free beer on this motherfuehrer. Heh? C'mon.
