- [first lines]
- Oktober Guard: Oktober Guard-1 to base, I'm receiving a sonar reading from beneath the ice. Probable submarine.
- [a giant hook pierces the jet from beneath the ice]
- Oktober Guard: Comrades, I've been struck! Damage critical. I'm ejecting.
- Dinsmore: This is a lovely specimen, Lord Chumley, but there's a frightful international row brewing over it.
- Lord Chumley: [clearing his throat] These things blow over. Remember the Boar War?
- Dinsmore: Painfully, sir.
- Lord Chumley: Oh yes, well, everyone else has forgotten it.
- Lord Chumley: Bagged her with one shot. Just one more trophy and my collection will be complete.
- Dinsmore: A space shuttle, sir?
- Lord Chumley: Tsk. Tsk. No sport there.
- Dinsmore: An aircraft career, perhaps?
- Lord Chumley: Bagged one in the big war. No, Dinsmore. I want the ultimate trophy - the head of the Autobot Optimus Prime.
- Hector Ramirez: Tension between the US and the Soviet Union reached its highest point today since the Cuban Missile Crisis. The Soviets accuse the US of using a submarine to steal a top secret Russian jet fighter. While the US denies the charge, both nations have placed their armed forces on full alert.
- Bumblebee: Decepticons.
- Lord Chumley: Chumley's the name and hunting's my game. I'm offering you a sporting chance to rescue your companions.
- Optimus Prime: Torture isn't sport, but I accept your challenge.
- Megatron: Whoever he is, he's brilliant for a flesh creature.
- Starscream: Especially since he has done more in two days than you have in two years.
- Lord Chumley: Decepticons. Trust them to spoil a hunt.
- Dinsmore: Yes, sir. Just like the Humane Society in a way.
- Lord Chumley: Bad show, you cursed scrapheap. You cheated me of the savor of victory.
- Dinsmore: Maybe you could make a nice coffee table out of him, sir.
- Optimus Prime: If that was your best shot, Chumley, you're in *deep* trouble.
- Lord Chumley: It was my best shot, but not my last.
- Dinsmore: [Optimus Prime is trapped in a shrinking room which threatens to crush him] This will make a frightful ruin of your trophy, Lord Chumley.
- Lord Chumley: Perhaps, but as the latest in modern sculpture, it will be smashing.
- [last lines]
- Hector Ramirez: Global tensions declined sharply today when sources revealed that the lost Soviet jet was stolen by a big game hunter. World leaders have praised Autobot leader Optimus Prime for returning Earth from the brink of war.
