Joyce DeWitt credited as playing...
Janet Wood
- Jack Tripper: Wait a minute, you'd go to a nude beach and get naked in front of total strangers but you wouldn't in front of me? That doesn't make any sense.
- Chrissy Snow: It makes perfect sense. See, I don't know them, and they don't know me and they don't know who they're seeing, and I don't know who's seeing me. But I know you, and you know me, and you know who you're seeing, and I know who's seeing me. And both of them are me! See?
- Jack Tripper: No, I don't see.
- Chrissy Snow: And you're not going to, either.
- [out the door]
- Jack Tripper: I'd undress in front of you!
- Janet Wood: Later, Jack, when we need a good laugh.
- Helen Roper: [naked behind the flower box] Don't come over here, Stanley!
- Stanley Roper: Why not? What are you got back there that I haven't seen before?
- Janet Wood: Me!
- Chrissy Snow: Janet, what are you doing back there?
- Janet Wood: Giving the azalias a thrill.
- Jack Tripper: Well, I was jogging along...
- Janet Wood: I don't believe you!
- Chrissy Snow: Neither do I.
- Jack Tripper: Okay, if you don't wanna hear about the naked girl I saw...
- Janet Wood: Wait! What naked girl?
- Jack Tripper: I don't know her name. I was running along on the beach and I turned to say hi and then I tripped over *another* one. Yes, everyone on that beach was *nude!*
- Chrissy Snow: They weren't wearing anything?
- Jack Tripper: Right! That's nude, that's nude. They were just wearing suntan lotion! Could you imagine everywhere I looked all I saw were shiny hills.
- Janet Wood: You mean, you mean, right here on our beach? Now come on, Jack, you're putting us on.
- Jack Tripper: It's true! I spend the last half hour talking to a naked redhead. Just to make sure.
- [chuckles]
- [first lines]
- Chrissy Snow: [struggling with phone] Hello? Hello? Hello?
- [Janet enters]
- Chrissy Snow: Janet, the phone's not working!
- Janet Wood: Oh, yeah, Chrissy, I know.
- [sits down]
- Chrissy Snow: Oh, when are you gonna get it fixed?
- Janet Wood: Oh, well, I... Wait a minute, Chrissy, wait a minute. Why should I be the one to have it fixed?
- Chrissy Snow: 'Cause you always take care of it.
- Janet Wood: The telephone has never been out of order before.
- Chrissy Snow: No, but the TV was.
- Janet Wood: Right. You see, as... as a matter of fact, I did call. The telephone company's gonna send a man over.
- Chrissy Snow: Oh, I knew you'd take care of it. When's he coming?
- Janet Wood: This afternoon.
- Chrissy Snow: This afternoon? I can't wait that long! I'm expecting a call from my date.
- Janet Wood: Oh, yeah? Who are you going out with?
- Chrissy Snow: Oh, I don't know. He hasn't called yet.
