Name: Playboy Millennium Calendar Girls
Genre: Documentary
Released: 1999-11-22
Duration: 59 min
Rating: 8.7
Cast: Lisa Montgomery, Joanne Guest, Kirsten Fi-Fi Imrie

'Millennium Calendars Girls' has those pretty English ladies on tap and it's a step-up from Playboy's 'Shagalicious British Babes' UK title. However having sat thru the latter and 'Celebrity Special: Adele Stevens', I was dismayed to see recycled footage. Honestly it's a rather simple affair. Some decent visuals for sure, but also bargain basement presentation, a fluctuating level of hotness.

Standard montage intro and host Lisa Montgomery here and thru out talking about upcoming ladies via blue screen (1 min). "January" is Joanne Guest who slowly disrobes at a snooker table. A few shots of playing break up the stripping with the largest portion on top of the table posing. Jo looks great, but it's rather slow, tame and I had already seen it before (5 mins). "February" is Kirsten Imrie and one massive tease. Eventually shown in black lingerie, but you have to settle for her topless and it takes an awfully long time to even arrive at this (5 mins).

"March" is Adele Stevens and unfortunately the other part I had already saw. Up against a wall in black vinyl, she sip on an adult beverage as the colors are purposely muted. It too never goes past topless. You can catch the very top of her bush peeking out once or twice, but the bottoms never come off (5 mins). "April" is Charmaine Sinclair and while she strips in front of blue screen - the visuals deliver. She looks great, goes nude quick and full body (4 mins).

"May" is Teresa May cuffed up in a black piece outside that goes on for a solid minute before it cuts to her topless letting her puppies go free. After the fact I found out they're enhanced, but that didn't change the enjoyment I got looking at them. She goes full nude, but the focus is up top (3 mins). "June" is Jordan (aka Katie Price) quickly getting into a bathtub. Hits all the sights you wanna see and the only thing missing is the massive chest she gained later on. Simple scene, but also semi decent (3.5 mins). "July" is the host herself - Lisa M - waking up from bed intercut with along a rocky coastline. The visuals you want come in equal dose in both. Her tanned blonde body gets shown off in many close-ups though it is has a slow pace (5 mins).

"August" is Sammi Jessop stripping in the middle of a field where the nudity comes steadily. It's the kinda scene you've seen a million times before so it won't blow your socks off, but it's not bad either (4 mins). "September" is Lana Cox who poses topless as part of a photoshoot. The bottoms come off, but again the focus is really up top. One too many shots of the photographer and not enough of Lana make this scene middling at best (5 mins). "October" is Mischa and the scene dynamics don't work. Behind a wired gate on a white set, she's a black lady in a fake pink wig. I never felt turned on and that's ultimately the point. Editing, quick cuts go a little bananas near the end (4 mins).

"November" is Linzi Dawn McKenzie. As she relaxes poolside or in grass, I'm not sure her massive all natural boobs have ever looked bigger. Camera is fond to stay glued to 'em as you can imagine, but there's also lovely shots including her muff (4 mins). "December" is Vicky Lee and it took me a second to realize she wasn't wearing a tube top, skirt in the traditional sense. She's wrapped quite literally in saran wrap. It's a novel concept. The sight of it being pulled off as she twirled around worked for me. It could have gotten down to business sooner, but the visuals on the back halve of a more lengthy scene make up for it somewhat. This tanned blonde has a nice body (6 mins).

If I had to sum up 'Millennium Calendars Girls', it's like a traditional PB video calendar without fancy camera work, higher budget. You still get a bevy of beautiful ladies taking it off, but the results are scattered. Not shockingly the more busty ladies stood out the most. Middle grade.

The documentary is a form of non-fiction storytelling that aims to present factual information, insights, and perspectives on real-world subjects, events, issues, or people. Documentaries can cover a wide range of topics, including history, science, culture, social issues, nature, biographies, and more.

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Millennium Calendar Girls

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