Name: Hänsel und Gretel verliefen sich im Wald
Genre: Comedy
Released: 1970-02-20
Duration: 1 h 22 min
Rating: 3
Cast: Dagobert Walter, Francy Fair, Barbara Scott

Cleverly crafted soft porn, eviscerated for U.S. release

Exploitation has curiously become a highly positive word for younger film fans, for reasons too mysterious for me to penetrate. But the bowdlerized U.S. version of this porno HANSEL & GRETEL shows the negative connotations the word should signal.

On video display courtesy of Something Weird, the English-dubbed movie cuts away every time a sex scene commences, leaving five minutes or so off the running time. The audience is being exploited -suckered if you were, just as hard-up patrons back in the '30s or '40s were bamboozled into paying to see the birth of a baby or other trivial "forbidden fruit". That's what exploitation in cinema really means: a polite euphemism for fraud.

Vet German director F.J. Gottlieb delivers a colorful, fairly goofy sex romp in this update of the familiar fairy tale. The handsome title couple (he's a bland German blond who the idiotic SWV shill misleadingly calls a "Michael York lookalike" despite no resemblance whatsoever) are driving along on holiday when a felled-tree in the road stops them. Beautiful Hexe (Barbara Scott, her breasts hanging out of her blouse) is a countess who picks them up, and takes them for a stay at her castle atop a nearby hill.

It's mainly sexual hijinks there, as Hexe seduces both of them, one by one, and a buxom maid Majd (Erika Rambach, who I wish had made more films) also services Hansel when not playing the voyeur, admiring the dongs on the stallions in the countess's stable.

English-version is not only truncated but saddled with a terribly cutesy and fey narration by "Oskar", treating the target audience with the utmost contempt. By the time H & G sort out their pre-marital hang-ups, and escape the clutches of the Countess (read: witch), this quite defective print has worn out its welcome.

It's a shame, because Continental professionalism has been reduced to garbage by American distributors. All-knowing latter-day pundits like to make fun of "Euro sleaze", "Euro trash" and the like, but the guilt for these guilty pleasures lies westward.

German cinema is famous for its historical depth, expressionist aesthetics, and social-political engagement. It has moved from Expressionism to political reckoning, from New German Cinema's raw realism to contemporary genre experiments. Its legacy lies in both technical innovation and deep explorations of history, morality, and philosophy.

The comedy genre refers to a category of entertainment that aims to amuse and entertain audiences by using humor, wit, and comedic situations. Comedies are created with the primary intention of eliciting laughter and providing lighthearted enjoyment. They encompass a wide range of styles, tones, and themes, appealing to various tastes and audiences.

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