Jimmie F. Skaggs credited as playing...
Drug Dealer #1
- Drug Dealer #3: [Riggs is in a Christmas tree lot, and pretends to sample some coke for a buy] Good, huh? Tasty? Smooth?
- Martin Riggs: Yeah, that's good...
- Drug Dealer #1: [walking up with a beer] Here ya go, pal...
- Martin Riggs: Thanks. Okay, so let's do it. How much?
- Drug Dealer #3: How much for how much?
- Martin Riggs: For all of it.
- Drug Dealer #3: You want it all. He wants it all.
- Drug Dealer #1: He wants it all, beautiful. Congratulations!
- Drug Dealer #3: All right!
- Martin Riggs: Maybe a nice six footer to put it under, huh?
- Drug Dealer #2: You want a tree? I'll tell you what. I'll give you the best tree I got on the lot, for nothin'. But the shit's gonna cost ya... a hundred.
- Martin Riggs: What, that much?
- Drug Dealer #3: Hey, you said you liked it, that's a fair price.
- Martin Riggs: Yeah... yeah! Hell, you only live once... get this together here...
- [takes out his wallet, starts counting out a hundred dollars]
- Martin Riggs: Twenty, forty, sixty, seventy...
- Drug Dealer #1: Hey, what the fuck...
- Drug Dealer #2: Hey, man... Hey!
- Martin Riggs: C'mon, shut up man, I'm losin' count... Ninety-three, ninety-four, ninety...
- Drug Dealer #2: Forget it, you dumbshit. One hundred THOUSAND. One hundred THOUSAND, DOLLARS!
- Martin Riggs: A hundred thousand?
- [laughs]
- Martin Riggs: I'm sorry, I can't afford that, not on my salary. But I'll tell ya what, I got a better idea, here. Let me say I take the whole stash of your hands for free, and you assholes can go to jail.
- [takes out his badge and puts it on the table in front of them]
- Martin Riggs: What do you say about that? Now I could read you guys your rights, but ah, you guys already know what your rights are, don't you?
- Drug Dealer #2: [drug dealers stare, then start to laugh] This badge ain't real. YOU ain't real.
- Drug Dealer #1: No, but you sure are a crazy son of a bitch!
- Martin Riggs: [They all laugh] You think I'm crazy? You call me crazy, you think I'm crazy? You wanna see crazy?
- [Riggs starts slapping him self on the head, Stooges style, then pokes their eyes and slaps them, and pulls out his gun]
- Martin Riggs: . Now that's a real badge, I'm a real cop, and this is a real fucking gun!
- Drug Dealer #2: [menacing] Okay, pal...
- Martin Riggs: Hey, noses in the dirt, asshole...
- [And the guns start blazin']
