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Virginia Grey, Rondo Hatton, Robert Lowery, and Joan Shawlee in House of Horrors (1946)

Alan Napier: F. Holmes Harmon

House of Horrors

Alan Napier credited as playing...

F. Holmes Harmon

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Quotes2

  • F. Holmes Harmon: [Hearing someone come in but not turning around] If you're the janitor, come back later. If you're anyone else, there's a window at the end of the hall, jump out of it.
  • Joan Medford: You know, sometimes I feel sorry for you. You must be very unhappy.
  • F. Holmes Harmon: You're wasting your pity. I'm really a very happy fellow. Especially when I'm deflating the egos of artistic pretenders.
  • Joan Medford: Steve Morrow is not a pretender. He's honest. And he has talent. And on top of that, he's successful.
  • F. Holmes Harmon: Judged by the dollar sign, yes. Unfortunately, the general public's appreciation of art is limited to billboards and magazine covers. The morons wallow in a sea of girls, girls, unbelievably beautiful and well-proportioned girls.
  • Joan Medford: Are you saying that Steve should paint ugliness instead of beauty?
  • F. Holmes Harmon: I don't say that anyone should do anything. I merely say, as a critic, what he actually does.
  • Joan Medford: Then why don't you temper your criticism with the truth? Oh sure, you have a right to say you don't like apple pie. But it's certainly unfair to say that apple pie isn't good.
  • F. Holmes Harmon: You're a clever wench, Joan. But we're not talking about apple pie. We're talking about cheesecake. Here, for example, is a little bit of your Mr. Morrow's "art".
  • [shows Joan a magazine cover with a bathing suit-clad model]
  • Joan Medford: Is that bad?
  • F. Holmes Harmon: It's revolting! Did you ever see a girl that perfect?
  • Joan Medford: You don't get around much, do you? That's why I feel sorry for you, Holmes. You crawl into your bottle of acid and stay there, dripping vitriol indiscriminately, always destroying.

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