Quotes

[on his interior-decorating career of almost four decades] I like what I'm doing now. It's clean. No makeup on the face.

Joan Crawford thought we should get married. This was back in the 1920s, when I was a star and she was a rising flapper. It wasn't just a crass question of her ambition; we were very good but platonic friends. I told her, "Cranberry"--my pet name for her--"that isn't how it works in Hollywood. They usually pair men who like men and ladies who like ladies". Because if we both liked men, where would we be as man and wife? She'd resent me, and that would be the end of our beautiful friendship.

I went to the beach house of a famous leading lady of the 1930s, which she wanted redecorated if it didn't cost too much. The only sculptures she had were of herself, so I asked her if she liked painting. She said she preferred wallpaper--flocked yet! And I found out that she ordered books by the yard. The woman was virtually illiterate!

[on the coming of sound to MGM] It was the night of the Titanic all over again, with women grabbing the wrong children and Louis B. Mayer singing "Nearer My God to Thee".

[on his friend, Joan Crawford] Until Joan discovered she could cover her furniture in plastic, there were entire apartments in Los Angeles that had been furnished with almost-new sofas and chairs that had been soiled once, then discarded.

[asked by a writer to compose his own epitaph] Here's something I want to get off my chest.