- Me? An angel! Just ask my mum about that!
- Jay Leno was a lovely guy - Jonathan Ross is awesome as well, mind. I have been on Oprah (Oprah Winfrey) a number of times and Letterman (David Letterman), but they weren't very personable, it was all for show and I think that makes a massive difference. Jay Leno and Jonathan Ross are different, they always make an effort off screen to come and say hello and get to know you. It is a little thing, but it makes a big difference. I understand that to the others it's just a job and that's fine, but it makes the ones who do bother really stand out.
- [on the Conservatives' 2015 general election win] This week the UK masochistically condemned itself to five more years of Tory rule. Without the Lib Dems to centre them they have no restraint, nothing to stop them destroying our welfare system, selling off our health services or even making constraints upon our democracy.
- I watch The X Factor UK (2004) in awe. Cheryl really has no idea that she can't sing at all. She tells people the strangest things about their voice when they are in fact great and far better than her.
- [on Cheryl taking back her husband Ashley Cole after he first cheated on her] No backbone.
- Look love [Cheryl], when you can sing fucking Ave Maria, then you can have a go. I will knock you out.
- Cheryl is a cow and Girls Aloud are five dogs without balls.
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