Quotes

[on the British Deputy Prime Minister and Foreign Secretary, respectively, in 1998)] I can't look at John Prescott without thinking of Les Dawson, and Robin Cook is a caricature of himself.

I think if there is a God it's very important that he has a sense of humour - otherwise you are in for a very miserable afterlife.

I remember when Tony Blair came into office and there was a sense I was thinking 'well, what on earth am I going to do now?', until I realized that's exactly what he was thinking.

[on the friendship of Tony Blair and Cliff Richard] I think Cliff Richard tells Blair (Tony Blair) what God is thinking. If the Archbishop of Canterbury and the Pope have telephone lines to God, then Blair thinks Cliff has got broadband.

How can you do satire when Blair (Tony Blair) is Middle East peace envoy, when Boris Johnson's running for London mayor and John Prescott's world ambassador for Weight Watchers? And I only made one of those up.

Just heard Jimmy Savile has died at 84. A nation's impressionists mourn. Quite a character. RIP.