- I would never watch my show. I'm not interested in it.
- If a wrestler could be governor, I could be president!
- (What's changed over the new millenium): "I've never been older... "
- I think technology has changed the way we see things. Human behavior has not changed in the last 3,000 years. There's nothing that has ever been on our show that isn't in the Bible, that isn't in literature, that isn't in Shakespeare.
- [on running for senate] I would love to have done it. But I have to have separation from the TV show. Research showed I could win, but people would want the show to be over before the campaign. It's hard to think about Iraq in the evening when I'm dancing with transvestites in the afternoon.
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