Quotes

If you ask me to play myself, I will not know what to do. I do not know who or what I am.

There used to be a me behind the mask, but I had it surgically removed.

To see me as a person on screen would be one of the dullest experiences you could ever wish to experience.

I'm a classic example of all humorists - only funny when I'm working.

Women are more difficult to handle than men. It's their minds.

I writhe when I see myself on the screen. I'm such a dreadfully clumsy hulking image. I say to myself, "Why doesn't he get off? Why doesn't he get off?" I mean, I look like such an idiot. Some fat awkward thing dredged up from some third-rate drama company. I must stop thinking about it, otherwise I shan't be able to go on working.

[on Blake Edwards' smash hit 10 (1979)] I turned down the lead role many, many times. I just didn't feel I was right for the part.

I'm a very ambitious person. I don't believe by any means that I've even begun to do what's inside me. I have a burning sort of fire inside me to do certain things which I know I'm going to do. I'm going to defeat all these berks that are around me and I'm going to do it. I mean, I have a name of being very difficult, I'm not difficult at all, I just cannot take mediocrity, I just cannot take it on any level.

You only know what happiness is once you're married. But then it's too late.

[on Goldie Hawn] In the fullest possible meaning of the word, she is so nice.

[on Sophia Loren] I was never in love with any woman as deeply as I was with Sophia.

[April 1969, interview in "Nova" magazine] When I look at myself I see a person who strangely lacks what I consider the ingredients for a personality.

[on developing a role for the screen] I walk around, trying different accents, feeling my way to the character. I stare at my own image in the mirror every morning, waiting for the other fellow - the man I'm going to play - to emerge and stare back at me. I am waiting for the stranger to come into my life. When it happens, I have this flush of happiness.

Most actors want to play "Othello", but all I've really wanted to play is Chance the Gardener. I feel what the character, the story is all about is not merely the triumph of a simple man, an illiterate. It's God's message again that the meek shall inherit the earth.

[on his wife Lynne Frederick] Lynne is different to all the ladies I've been attracted to. She's a good one, that girl; and a terrific bloody actress. I met Lynne at one of Dennis Selinger's parties...we were mutually attracted to each other... I think she will become a very good actress in a full sense of the word actress. Although she doesn't want to be - she wants either to be a housewife or continue to studying physics. Everyone I've met, including Malcolm McDowell, was knocked out by her performance in this film Voyage of the Damned (1976).

[on Peter Sellers (1978) when he is told to tone down his erratic behavior and just be himself] But that, you see, my dear Kermit, would be altogether impossible. I could never be myself. You see, there is no me. I do not exist. There used to be a me, but I had it surgically removed.

[Talking about the voice he used for Chance the gardener in Being There (1979)" ........very clear enunciation, slightly American with a touch of Stan Laurel mixed in"

I feel extremely vulnerable, and I need help a lot. A lot. I suppose I feel mainly I need the help of a woman. I'm continually searching for this woman. They mother you, they're great in bed, they're like a sister, they're there when you want to see them, they're not there when you don't. I don't know where they are. Maybe they're around somewhere. I'll find one, one of these days.